You can’t imagine it, Jessie J remarks. At that moment preparing for her new album launch in nearly a decade, deeply enamored with her recent boyfriend, and at long last the mom to a little one after struggling to conceive for a decade, riding high. Suddenly in spring she was found to have breast cancer.
The artist, actual name Jess Cornish, is renowned for speaking her mind. The album, the provocatively titled album, was meant as an transparent story, tackling every bit of hardship she’d experienced since she last made an album (endometriosis, losing a baby, broken romances, gaslighting, mental health struggles) with her usual frankness. The lead track, the song No Secrets, was released in April. But by then there was a mighty secret. Her diagnosis. Later next release, the upbeat Living My Best Life, was released in late spring and she was speaking publicly about how she was enjoying life to the fullest, while still secretly living with her cancer. A month later she went public, and in July she had a mastectomy.
She offers me her best “Are you kidding?” expression. “I release with a song called No Secrets. I’m doing every press talk, and they’re, like, ‘So what’s new with you?’ and I answer, ‘Uh, nothing really’” Cornish has just had to call off performances because she’s yet to undergo follow-up surgery.
Our interview takes place at a photography studio in London. She is sporting a beige fake-leather jacket, denim trousers with elaborate white patches, cream boots and big frames. Think biker chic meets 70s singer aesthetic. “I feel like I’m in the 1970s and I should have a partner with a mustache.” A biker reference, I say, recalling the picture. “That’s what people called me at school!” She grins. Cornish is quick, unfiltered and filter-free. She says she has always wanted to try comedy and is hoping to make her first comedy performance in the coming year. “I enjoy humor. On stage I basically roast the fans.”
Health Struggles and Diagnosis
The artist was preparing for an performance at the ceremony when she found a lump. “I immediately went to get it examined, had an ultrasound, and they were, like, ‘It seems benign; your breasts are normal.’ And I insisted, ‘But I can feel it. I have arm pain and pins and needles in my hands whenever I rise.’ And they suggested, ‘We should biopsy it?’ That was 28 March, the following my birthday.” It was a Friday. The physician told her if it was serious she’d contact on the Monday. By then Cornish had convinced herself it was okay. The way she tells it, it was simply too inconvenient to face illness when she had many commitments.
“Just two weeks before from debuting the project after eight years without an album and no new music. And the doctor messaged and said, ‘Are you free at six?’ And I was, like, ‘It’s virtual, probably routine.’ So I join the call believing it’s all going to be positive, and she says, ‘You might want to sit.’ You know that sad tone they use? And she continues, ‘Unfortunately but your reports have indicated aggressive cancer.’” What was your reaction? “I answered, ‘That’s unfortunate. That’s not fucking great timing.’ My initial thought was, ‘I can’t die because my son needs me.’”
Men have called me difficult because I’m a strong person who understands who I am
She found the surgery frightening and surreal. “I fear going under. They walk you down. During crises you are wheeled, but this time I just strolled down with a gown on and my backside out. It felt surreal.” But, Cornish says, she’s been lucky. Without chemo or radio, just the surgery. “It’s terrible, but you know what? Luckily it was detected early. I had the mastectomy a few months back and my one side now resembles a fruit under fabric.” A further beam. “I got to keep the nipple, though.”
The next operation is both medical and cosmetic. Her chest, she remarks, are now “different sizes. The size doesn’t match. So inconsiderate! I felt, why make it worse, I’m already having a rough time. So rude! Ironically I said I’d avoid breast surgery because I’ve got perfectionism, and I know they’d never be perfect. Illness changed that.”
Previous Struggles
Cornish is familiar with health problems. She feels her outlook on her diagnosis has been so upbeat because she’s familiar with medical emergencies. Frequently they align with professional successes, functioning as a wake-up call, or punch in the stomach, to make her recall not to take anything for granted. “Truly, I feel the universe whispers, ‘Enjoying yourself? Hold on.’ Ever since I was a child, it has always gone alongside achievements for me; something severe or obscure has impacted my body.”
She takes me back to her youth, already beginning starring in the London theater in a musical (she was chosen at the age of 9). That’s when she was told about the heart condition Wolff-Parkinson-White syndrome, which can cause a tachycardia as well as vertigo and heart flutters. “I attended rehearsals intermittently on an IV drip, and returning to the hospital at night.” She skips forward six years, and 17-year-old Jess has entered the girl group Soul Deep while enrolled in the academy. “I secured a deal, and I had a brain incident. Then when I was planning to release songs in recently I had a car crash and my larynx moved up and I couldn’t sing for a year.”
Wow, I say, slow down, I need a moment. You really had a stroke at 17? She nods|agrees
